#19 How many opticians does it take to change a light bulb? Is it one or two? One… or two? One…or two? The only problem was it took him an hour to deliver it. #18 He gave a great 10-minute business speech yesterday. #17 I stayed in such an exclusive hotel on our last business trip that even room service had an unlisted number! #16 I don’t like to complain about the customer service of any business but I didn’t appreciate being pushed over by the stock broker when I asked him to check my balance. #15 How many marketers does it take to screw a light bulb? None, they have already automated it. He told me not to think of him as the boss, rather, think of him as a friend who is never wrong.” #13 ‘Business is up and down at the moment I sell yo-yos.’ #12 I told my female colleague that she drew her eyebrows too high. #11 Why did the electrician close business once a week? Because business was light. #10 What did the ruthless businessperson say to their employees? If at first you don’t succeed, you’re fired! #9 What happens when business slows right down at a medicine factory? You can hear a cough drop. The friend grabbed a life preserver, held it up, not knowing if the banker could swim, and shouted, “Can you float alone?” “Obviously,” the banker replied, “but this is a heck of a time to talk business.” #8 The banker fell overboard from a friend’s sailboat. #7 Why did the doughnut maker retire? He was tired of the hole business! Every time something went wrong in my old job, my manager told me I was always responsible!‘ #6 ‘We need somebody for this role who is responsible.’ #5 Boss to employees: ‘We will continue to have these meetings every single day until I work out why no work is being done’!
#4 If a neighboring business puts up a sign saying ‘lowest prices’, simply erect your own sign saying ‘main entrance’! #3 My boss told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down. ‘My hairline is in recession, my stomach is always in inflation, and these two together bring me into a deep depression’.
#1 My boss asked me to put a joke on the first slide of the presentation…apparently a picture of my pay slip wasn’t what he was looking for. If you have a great, clean workplace joke that you’d like to share please drop us a line – we’ll be adding to the list and would be happy to include your suggestions! Warning: Many of the following jokes are real groaners, so don’t say I didn’t warn you! A joke can help breakup a serious business presentation, add some seasoning to a business meeting, or add a dash of humor to your e-mail signature line. Some companies have a “joke of the day” board in their office some companies offer the option of listening to a joke on their automated voicemail menu. But of course there are times when a well-placed joke can add a little spice to the workday. I always stress that being funny, having a great sense of humor, and adding more humor into a workplace has very little to do with telling jokes.
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